Every week in my newsletter (sign up here), I have a Reddit Sex Story of the Week. This week, rather than highlight just one sex story, we highlight multiple, all written by one redditor named BadDad1214. In actuality, it is one long story that has been broken into parts over a 100 day period, and is ongoing.
BadDad1214 has had an ongoing sexual relationship with his daughter that has had just enough realistic details to convince me it is real. He won't offer the age of his daughter (indicator number one), and has had rough sex with her which has resulted in injury. The sex has also occurred while his two younger boys have been home.
BadDad's wife is from India and they were married by arrangement (I assume he is Indian as well). The daughter is his daughter by a previous marriage. The wife has left for India to take care of her parents, and in her absence BadDad and his daughter have assumed a kind of "dating" relationship in absolute secret.
Well, except that the internet knows.
I devised a game for this session. In this game, Dave would tie up his balls using string. I would have control over whether or not the strings tightened. His part would be to masturbate and attempt to cum. It was a race: if he could cum before I had him tighten the strings enough to castrate himself.
He wasn't keen on this game. I had to threaten him with public exposure, and he finally relented. I imagine his protests were only designed to make me threaten him, thereby arousing him.
We began and I asked him a series of questions, in order to distract him from masturbating. I asked him if he had been raped or had raped anyone. He answered no, but admitted to having rape fantasies in which his "girlfriend" dresses him in women's clothes and "Tying me down and a guy fucking me while I'm gagged and cuffed....It's hard to stay hard during this topic. Can we change it?"
I absolutely would not change it. I drew parallel's between his mother and his "girlfriend": "That's the kind of thing your mother would do: abandon you when you needed her, stand by and watch you get hurt....Do you fantasize about your mother watching you in sexual situations?"
He questioned if I was really trying to castrate him. I was only playing the game, I answered. Then added:
"In the rape scenario with your girlfriend, if your girlfriend mirrors your mother, is the raping male figure your father? Is this how you're able to feel closeness with your father---being joined through the violence inflicted by your mother?"
He begged me to change the subject and said again he was having a hard time staying hard. He asked if he could have a toy: a buttplug, small but still significant. Testing him further, I had him use Deep Heat as lube on the buttplug. He attempted to fight me on it, but gave in quickly. The exchange following is astounding:
"It's in...It's hot already...It's hurting...Please. Let me take it out?"
"You can use your safe words if you need to. Suffer the penalties of course."
And then, a long delay before his response:
"I came. So hard. I've not cum that hard in a long time. It was intense as hell."
The fear of castration, the incestuous, violent images of his mother, fantasies of forced feminization and rape, and severe rectal burning all contributed to his orgasm. One, he observes himself, which is the most intense he's had in a while.
I'm afraid that Dave cannot divorce pain, humiliation and sex. I believe this has roots in his childhood, something traumatic that happened with his mother, perhaps also abuse by his beloved father. This need for pain and suffering very likely could branch out---where hurting himself for sexual pleasure will lose it's potency and he must hurt others. Most likely little boys, replaying a scenario of violence he himself suffered in his childhood.
Day two revealed differences in attitude with Dave. I began our conversation with questions about his parents. His father he reveres, while his mother he loathes for the poor, abusive treatment of his father. I pointed out that the qualities his mother displayed can be found in his "girlfriend". This revelation resulted in a shift in the conversation.
Dave asserted that I called him "boring". I did not remember doing so, but I went with him as this offered insight into his thinking and agreed that he is boring.
He became combative, argumentative, even manipulative. Dave continued to wrestle the conversation away from me, trying to turn it upon me. He asked me questions, bargained with me for answers, then asserted that he truly had all the power. Any power I had, he maintained, was given to me by him and could be taken easily.
Above all, he fought me upon the comparison with his mother and "girlfriend", demonstrating vividly that he truly, deeply agreed with the interpretation. His fight for power was a strategy to remove the power and impact of this observation. If I had no power, my words had no power.
Though he admitted arousal (especially when I mentioned slapping him), he did not orgasm. I forbid him to cum that night and said he needed to have rubber bands for our conversation tonight. We will be exploring pain.
This isn't meant to be a confessional as I don't feel any guilt. I have no conscience to appease, no burden to alleviate.
I had a long term online roleplay relationship, with someone I met on Reddit's dirtypenpals, with a British man. We'll call him Bill. Bill was married, with a young daughter, with a normal job, driving to work every morning in traffic and being very tired when he got home.
Bill was very protective of me, as much as he could be online. He loved me, too, as much as he could online. We played out many sexual fantasies which were extremely stimulating. He had special tastes as well.
For example, he liked to fantasize about beating the shit out of me, choking me, violently fucking me until I bled. Once we even used blood as part of sex.
Once he confessed to fantasizing about killing women he saw in public, and couldn't explain why. He was also suicidal, which frightened me, and suffered from depression.
As far as fantasies went, Bill liked age play. Particularly, incestuous age play. When I called him Daddy in a text, it would instantly transform our communication. I would write my dialogue as a little girl (8-10 years old) and he would proceed to seduce me. These were the most profound fantasies that we had, and extremely moving for him. The combination of tender fatherly feelings with sexual desire satisfied him in ways he couldn't explain. In fact, I'm hard pressed to explain it myself. It was never violent, and it was filled with love.
I participated because it was moving for me as well, and it didn't feel wrong. If anything, it served as a great comfort.
He had always told me that he would never think of his own daughter in this way and I believed him. I don't talk to him anymore---this is how RP relationships go. They don't seem to last long.
I could never believe that Bill was anything monstrous. He had sexual desires he couldn't explain, and couldn't discuss with his wife or anyone else. To do so would be a kind of suicide. This is wrong. These are things men should be allowed to discuss. We must face that underage sex, and extremely underage sex, is something that, most likely, many of the men in our lives find sexually stimulating.
Now I was rock hard. I'm ashamed to say. I felt entirely helpless to my feelings. I felt possessed by a voracious demon. What made this so much worse was that she had just sent this. And she was in her bedroom upstairs right now.
I didn't think. I did what any man would do having received this kind of pic from a young sexy woman. I pulled my cock out and snapped a pic of me rubbing it. I sent it immediately. I then jumped up and went to the kitchen. I found the bottle of Crown in the freezer and took a large icy swig.
My phone vibrated. A reply already.
I wish I could suck on that right now.
I dropped my phone. I took another swig. What was wrong with me? I had never lusted after my daughter.
Estranged relatives have a fifty percent chance of feeling sexually attracted to one another.
Go here for an interview with a woman who is engaged to her biological father.
It's no wonder incest is such a hot fetish on reddit's /r/dirtypenpals (a place I might be found if you're in the neighborhood). Perhaps there's a biological grounding in all incestuous sexual curiosity.
I've been extraordinarily open minded about sex ever since my first year in college, when I learned women could have orgasms. (I was a late bloomer in high school.) Nothing shocks me. All of it interests me. I can never get enough of it.
All of the pics in my blog are stolen/borrowed from other websites. I consider myself not really a thief, but a pirate. Arrrrrrr!!!
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crazy, dirty bastard.
And I thought I was fucked up.